Punctuation phobia and a funny sighting today

 There is not going to be any commas in this post because I have written a children’s story of 7700 words and I am tired of putting commas in then taking them out as I read in modern writing commas are not used much but spell check makes me feel guilty so I put them back in again only to worry if my work is sent for a critique it will be full of commas that will be crossed out so I took them out again but it didn’t read right so put half in and left the other half out but some people say going half and half in life is not good they say life is ‘all or nothing’  but then others say moderation is the key. I got a migraine and threw the print-out in the bin. Now I cannot remember if I have taken them out or left them in what I do know is I AM NOT DOING COMMAS EVER- AGAIN- IN- MY- LIFE!
Full stops are necessary because we all need to breathe and I don’t know about you but reading that first paragraph I went blue in the face. If that  happened to you as well I apologise. I will use more full stops so it doesn’t happen again. 
 
Paragraphs are good they give space and time to gather my thoughts and for the reader to breath deeply.
Semicolons are like having a colonoscopy apparently…to be avoided at all costs unless you think you might die tomorrow so I am not using them either although dying was looking good after trying to figure out commas. 
Exclamation marks… Don’t use more than one well when I want to get a point across like’ I am confused about the correct way to use commas!!! I NEED THREE EXCLAMATION MARKS, DON’T CARE!!!!!!!!!
Backslash asterisks ditto marks what about killer sharks?( Sorry got carried away)… question marks they can stay otherwise there would be no answers to anything as we wouldn’t know if a question was asked or a statement made.
A hyphen alternatively referred to as a dash minus sign subtract or negative is lucky to have so many names and be so important like when I was writing another story and was talking about 250-year-old trees which was a very pivotal part of the story. If I didn’t use those important little bars I would have had 250 year old trees which  could equally refer to 250 trees that are all one year old. Never had a migraine over hyphens they are cool little fellows.
I feel better now that I have got all that off my chest it has been a real pick-me-up. Let me know if you suffer with this illness called punctuation-phobia. I am worried if the illness get worse could I possibly end up in a comma…sorry coma…
ps. this is full of passive voice (computer keeps telling me…I DON’T CARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
On a brighter note…
THE FUNNIEST SIGHTING TODAY…
I am not sure if this is mean but I couldn’t stop laughing.  I was driving to the supermarket. It was pelting down with rain and in front of me was this poor man driving a very old American Jeep (like in Mash) very slowly. It was complete with tools on the side and all.
My daughter and I were discussing how drenched he must be. All he had on was a t-shirt and a peak cap (yes, of course pants).  We wondered if the jeep was filling up with water.  Every now and then he would give a tiny swerve or wiggle I would call it and we wondered why…then we saw the reason. The windscreen wipers were on the INSIDE of the windscreen and he was manually wiping with them. OMG…it was so funny to see. The side mirror was so far away from him he had to almost lean out to see it. I wish I had a movie camera it was priceless.
I have blocked out the number place, didn’t want the poor man known in any way and I circled the windscreen wiper so you can see out small it was and how big he is.
IMG_0414 (Large)
Not a great pic but my daughter took it with her phone as we were moving.
I have a busy schedule next week so I will be missing. Happiness to everyone. Keep creating and I will catch up the week after.
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26 thoughts on “Punctuation phobia and a funny sighting today

  1. Oh randomrose what an absolutely wonderful post. Made my evening. Commas drive me insane too. You can never use enough but simultaneously you can tend towards overuse. Haha. Thank you for making my evening and letting me exercise a bit of my own comma freedom here! 🙂 have a great week ahead! 😉

    • Hee hee, thank you! I am glad I did this post as we are all having a nice full voiced SHOUT! I also read once where capital letters ( shouting over cyber space) is not etiquette. Yes! HOW NICE TO LET OUR HAIR DOWN OCCASIONALLY ! Happiness to you. 🙂

  2. Nooo, punctuation shows us how the writer wants us to read and express their writing!!

    Don’t take any notice of what so-called modern thinking is on punctuation. If you write it as you hear it being spoken in your head, then you’ll need commas (and everything else) to help the reader make sense of it.

    As for semi-colons, well, George Orwell called them a ‘middle-class piece of punctuation’ but if you use them to replace a conjunction in a piece of writing in which you need to build excitement or suspense, you’ll find they do just that, slicking up the narrative and carrying the reader along with it.

    I love punctuation; it helps me express myself in writing as clearly as I can speaking (I hope!!!). Love, Alex the punctuation revolutionary. :o)

    • Alex you are so right. I agree totally. Unfortunately I was carried away with listening to too many people and reading too many books on the subject. Thank you for your sound advice. I am printing out your reply and sticking on my computer to remind me to stay with what I know. ( or think I know).

  3. I could SO relate to this very amusing story! Once met a writer who when I asked her how her day had been replied “Hell! I’ve been micromanaging commas all day!” So eliminating the pesky little critters is a good way to go!!! And I believe you can never have too many exclamation marks!!! Love ’em!! And love you!!!!

    • Thank you my darling, talented, beautiful niece. I am having a flag made…FULL OF DELICIOUS EXCLAMATION MARKS… thank you for your support and love you right back!!!!!!!

  4. You ARE in a mood. I can feel it. I don’t believe I’ve laughed this hard all week. You post is delight to read. I know what you mean about punctuation phobia. The full stop use might go up if some people didn’t write endless sentences. 🙂

  5. I guess you’ve probably figured out by now over at my place that *I* have the opposite disease: Punctophilia. If there’s a way to make a sentence longer, the meaning more abstruse, the path from start of paragraph to its finish—including any pitstops, byways and other diversions—any more convoluted and bizarre, I’m likely to throw it in!!!!!!!! 😉 Loved this post, not least of all the eccentric jeep driver, who apparently could’ve used a full-stop overhead, at the very least. 😀
    xo,
    Kathryn

    • Oh I do love your reply. We are interesting creatures us humans. I love your writing so all your punctuation must be in their correct little homes as I never trip or falter or run out of breath when reading your great posts. (I think I should have a comma somewhere :). ). ,,,,, ( just in case here is a few to tied me over)

  6. Nice post. Ha Ha Jeep lovers are unique guys I know because I am one too. Basically outdoor types. And the more rugged the terrain greater the fun 🙂 But now I only have my car having disposed off the jeep.
    Cheers 🙂

    • What a brave lot you are, rugged is certainly the word. The whole scene was amazing. The man was tall and rugged looking which made the jeep seem so small. I was wondering if he was wearing flippers as I am sure he was swimming around. 🙂 🙂

  7. Yep. I do really hate having to think about whether I need a comma or not. I love exclamation marks though Rose. Love this blog. Laughed a lot when I saw it. The fellow in the Jeep would have been an interesting sight. Feel sorry for him in the rain.

    • Thank you for your nice comment. It is amazing how this tiny mark can confuse us. Worse still how this tiny mark can almost start a war between the old and new generations. No commas in this reply. Love that dot of stop……….! 🙂

  8. Love this post – thanks for the big smile – I have been there too – DON’T CARE.
    Just wonder how you manage to see all the details with the jeep, he must have been driving very slow. *smile

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